Dreamcatcher Holistic Healing

Analysis of Another Self: Illness as a Message in Sevgi's Family System

Published August 8, 2024

Analysis of Another Self: Illness as a Message in Sevgi's Family System

In the series Another Self, Sevgi’s story illustrates how illness can serve as a profound form of communication within the family system. From the perspective of family constellations, we understand that illness is not always just a physical ailment but a reflection of unresolved emotional patterns. In Sevgi’s case, her cancer is a message from something deeper that needs to be healed.

Illness as Protection and a Message

For Sevgi, illness is not a punishment but a reminder that something in her family system needs attention. In family constellations, illness often emerges as a signal that something has been hidden or unrecognized within the family, and its function may be to protect us from continuing to ignore these patterns. It’s an opportunity to pause, observe the system, and heal what has been left unresolved.

Sevgi’s illness appears because, at the age of 5, she witnessed the murder of her father, creating a deep emotional trauma. This trauma became frozen inside her, as a child she lacked the emotional tools to process grief. In family constellations, we recognize that these unresolved traumas tend to manifest in adulthood, often through illness.

The Role of Childhood Trauma

When a child experiences a traumatic event like the violent death of a parent, that unprocessed pain gets stored in the body and soul. In Sevgi’s case, her trauma remained frozen, and this unresolved trauma is linked to her illness. As in many other cases we see in family constellations, when such a severe event occurs in childhood, the child cannot fully process it, which creates a lasting impact.

It is in adulthood that this trauma resurfaces in more visible ways, through emotional and physical blockages, and in some cases, illness. Sevgi’s healing process not only involves treating her cancer but also facing the trauma of her childhood and releasing the pain she has carried.

The Two Fathers: Biological and Caregiver

In Sevgi’s life, there are two important paternal figures: her biological father, who was murdered, and the person who cared for her after his death. In family constellations, it is crucial to recognize and give a place to both fathers, as each plays an essential role in her development and in her family system. The biological father gave her life, but he also carried a history of violence and tragedy. The caregiver father, on the other hand, provided emotional and physical support, helping to stabilize her childhood after the trauma.

Sevgi’s healing requires honoring both, recognizing that each one gave her something valuable. Only when she establishes a balanced bond with both fathers can she release the emotional burdens that have been passed down through generations.

The Place of the Killer and the Victim in the Family System

A profound aspect of family constellations is that both the victim and the perpetrator must have a place in the family system. This does not mean justifying the act of violence but giving a place to the pain so it can be processed and healed. In Sevgi’s story, the murderer of her father is part of her system, and denying that place only perpetuates the trauma. It’s necessary to recognize what happened, give space to the pain, and allow love to flow in that context.

Sevgi must face this part of her history, giving a place to her murdered father and acknowledging the presence of the murderer in her family system, to release the pain she has unconsciously carried for so long.

The Inverted Role with Her Mother: The Daughter as the Symbolic Partner

After her father’s death, Sevgi took on a role that was not hers: she became the emotional support figure for her mother. In family constellations, this is known as the "inverted role," where children take on a place that belongs to the deceased spouse. In this case, Sevgi’s mother, having not processed her own grief, relied on her daughter to fill the void left by her husband. This relationship creates a codependent dynamic where Sevgi has no space to grow as a daughter but assumes the role of caregiver and protector for her mother.

These kinds of relationships often create blockages in other areas of the person’s life, such as romantic relationships. By assuming her father’s role, Sevgi has no space for a partner in her adult life because she is emotionally occupied with the dynamic between herself and her mother.

Her Profession as a Reflection of Her Family Tree

Another fascinating aspect of Sevgi’s story is her profession: a lawyer. This is no coincidence, as her profession is directly linked to justice, balance, and healing the wounds of her family system. As a lawyer, Sevgi seeks justice in the external world, but in her personal life, the justice she needs is to balance her family trauma, honoring both victims and perpetrators, and allowing love to flow once again.

Healing the System to Heal the Illness

Sevgi’s illness is a reflection of the unresolved wounds in her family system. Through family constellations, it’s possible to observe these traumas, honor the pain, and free the family members from emotional burdens that have been carried for generations. By acknowledging her trauma, giving a place to both fathers and the murderer, and letting go of her role as caregiver, Sevgi has the opportunity to heal deeply, not only physically but emotionally and spiritually.

Family constellations teach us that illness, trauma, and family relationships are deeply intertwined. By healing our personal and family history, we open the door to a freer, more balanced, and fulfilling life.

Does Sevgi’s story resonate with you? In Online family constellations, each of us carries unresolved stories from our family system. If you want to learn more or heal your own story, schedule a family constellation session. I can help you look at what your soul needs to see to heal. DM for more information or visit the link in my bio.

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